


After Feros

by MadameClutch



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Humor, I was bored at midnight, Not gender specific Shepard, Space Plant Vagina, Thorian - Freeform, feros
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-26 10:01:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7569868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadameClutch/pseuds/MadameClutch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The crew discussed what they saw on Feros, under Zhu's Hope.</p>
            </blockquote>





	After Feros

The cargo bay was silent except for the clink of armor being cleaned, guns being recalibrated, and the occasional disgusted shudder from the ground crew.

  
Minutes drag on as they all sit in silence, waiting on the call to the briefing room from Commander Shepard. When the summons actually came, the entire crew hesitated before heading to the painfully slow elevator. Elbows bumped and fringes scraped as the multi-species crew piled into the little room.

  
The quiet here seemed even more deafening as the elevator crawled up.

  
"Fuck it, we're all thinking it." Garrus' voice cut the air like a dual toned knife. "The Thorian? Fucking space plant vagina."

  
"Goddess, I KNOW!"

  
"Keelah, I thought I was going to lose my lunch."

  
"I'd rather look down a maw's throat than see that again."

  
"Spirits, it was just plain _wrong_."

  
"Skipper did the galaxy a favor, taking down that damned thing."

  
The door finally opens at the next level, releasing the crew from their slow traveling prison and into a conversation that mirrored their own.

  
"... I'm telling you, Kaiden, it was a giant, nasty, space cunt!"

  
"It couldn't have been that bad, Shepard."

  
"IT BIRTHED PUKING ZOMBIES, KAI. PUKING. ZOMBIES."

  
The entire ground crew stared as their commanding officer, Commander Shepard, staggered up the steps to the CIC, still muttering disgustedly about plants giving birth and never doing jobs for the council again.


End file.
